Tales of catastophe, sex and squalor from the Alpine Underbelly...

Belle de Neige

Tuesday, 15 January 2013

Alarming ski fashion

Can someone please explain the thinking behind this to me?

The lavender. The green triangle patterns. The flying goggles. The pointy elf hat. The ancient boots. The bum bag. It's all there. It's like.....text book.

It was all I could do to stop myself from leaping onto this man, wrestling him to the floor and screaming "GIVE ME YOUR OUTFIT! IT MUST BE MINE!"

Do you think this bloke realises that in seasonnaire terms, he is a fucking style icon? A beacon of outstanding naff ski dressing in a world of stease and advanced technology that takes itself waaaaay to seriously?

Whoever you are young man, I salute you.


  1. predictable, unoriginal.. ski fashion in the eyes of seasonahh kids who use skiing as a means to apres. 'onesies' can suck a fat one. peas

    1. possibly the most unhelpful and unestablished post of all time. ever. I have two One Pieces that I intend to take to the 3 vallies, I might just bring some tall tees, hoodie, twin tips, and snake behind you all day as a seasonahh park rat to annoy you.

      Let me know if your game,

      C x

  2. You know, I have a similar red get up, circa 1985, which you are welcome to. I go out every year with the hope of a onesie blading session, but it never happens...

  3. Anonymous 1: Sorry to be predictable and unoriginal... what subject matter would you suggest I tackle in this blog about seasonnaire life.... also what's with the 'peas'?

    Anonymous 2 aka 'C': How do you mean 'unestablished'? I should very much like to spend a day with you snaking behind me as a park rat. It sounds like a hoot. When can we arrange this day of fun?

    Anonymous 3: We should organise this onesie blading session and make it an annual event. My Mum had several amazing asymmetrical numbers which had she not thrown them away I would have coveted deeply.

  4. I think Anonymous 2 aka 'C' was responding to 'Anonymous 1'. In which case you should team up.
    Much love anonymous 4 (? - god this is confusing - I have a simple mind)

  5. Ahhh.... I'm confused. Besides I think I know who anonymous 2 is anyway and I'm a big fan of their work.

  6. Oh man that got out of hand, sorry for being so brutal last night, I was in a bad mood and stumbled across this post. the only point I wanted to make was that skiing is about skiing, it shouldn't be a fashion parade, but on the other hand.. if that's what you're into then fair do's, get all dressed up.
    Anon 2.. ooooh 'Twin Tips'! Dude. park is my life. the fact that you call yourself a park 'rat' made my spine creep haha, watch you don't trip over all your swag and that tee of yours.
    B de N, keep writing, the other two posts I read of yours are very good

    Anon 1

  7. Yes BN I think you are on to me; i am obviously the guy who gave you a long post in your 'slalom' entry - still no reply on that one. hurt.

    I would be more than happy to spend a day looking far too cool with my Tall Tees snaking behind my fellow skiers, I do however charge and I charge more if you want me dressed as Jon Olsson.

    I do actually have some new twinnies which I am desperate to shred in the formidable family park in courch 1850 (is it still called that??).

    BN where is your chalet?

    Kind Regards,


  8. Ohhhh my dayssss these onesies are everywhere in Courch!! I miss them :/ I got flown home last week due to royally screwing my knee up and putting a short end to my season. Someone send me of these fine specimin onesies home pleeeeasssseee

  9. Oh dear...sorry to hear you've fallen prey to the classic knee injury. Where were you working?

  10. 1850 for a company I probably aren't allowed to name. I got to ride in a blood wagon so not all bad!

  11. Haha. Ah the blessed blood wagon. Yes I have had that experience also. They are still chasing me for payment...ooops! BdN


Your comments will be moderated before being accepted.